Sometimes I cry so hard from pleading
So sick and tired of all the needless beating
This Is Me
Me. Magical. Min. Maniac. Monster. Monetary.
"Never let anything known for anyone to stab you in."
FORGIVE BUT NEVER FORGET!
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Sunday, January 2, 2011
Happy New Year... NOT!
I just cannot control it. I swear I've tried! I did my best. I really put in 101% effort. I did. Please, please believe me. The pressure was eating me inside out. I can feel it growing in my tummy, rounding up at my throat and squirming itself out of my mouth. It was devouring my bones, muscles, organs and flesh. I can feel it conquering my mind, my thoughts and my actions. My body felt like it belongs to someone else. It was way too tiring to be constantly swimming against the continuous tides which kept pushing me underwaters while I try my best to keep afloat. The underwater torrents of current were pulling me deeper. It is useless to struggle on. I had to throw in the white flag. I had to give in.... I did my best... I really did.The evil devil inside me is now free!I am here to destroy the anticipation/excitement anyone have for the New Year.
It's not as though I had a bad New Year but I really don't see what's the big idea.
I have been through 11 "New Year"s' and I still don't see what's the big shit about this day. Like birthday or Christmas, it comes every year. If you were to really ask me a date or day worthy of attention and celebration, it had just to be the LEAP YEAR. My my, it comes every 4 years~ That, is special.
Anyway, I got up at the wrong side of bed this morning (weird, how that can happen when one side of my bed is facing the wall and the other side is the ONLY side to get out) and am was feeling a BIT naughty. Nope, not the horny naughty but the mean, teasing naughty.
Logged onto Facebook and I started to shoot everyone down. It wasn't that kind of "bring-you-down" that I've experienced when those people criticize me. It was more of the joking fun. So, if you were one of the victim, I AM JUST JOKING.
The meanest I could remember is saying some sweet nothings and then turning against my words. This is not the actual one but it's very similar to that. It goes, "You will always be the prettiest in my eyes. *Turns around and puke uncontrollably* Sorry, that wasn't intentional. Like I was saying, *stops midway and puke again*. Oops. Think the bare thought of *puke again and collapse*.". Ya... You get the drift.
I think I am si bey di siao,. But sorry la... Must understand that lonely old hag is like that one. Anyway, my New Year was as usual, except that this year, there's majong (am definitely not involved).
This is from the bottom of my heart: May you think like me, may you not, I do wish that your New Year was celebrated the way you wanted it to be. I wanted to be left alone, without ringing mobiles and constant stream of incoming SMSes. I got half of it. How about you?
(-.-") I still cannot believe I am that fucking softie, which I hate, in heart. I have never heard of anyone else visiting a bear farm OR eating a crab and crying so much that she could fill a bucket of water. My poor Dad had to be the one sent to pacify me and it only made me cry harder.
But baby, where they knock you down and out
Is where you're oughta stay