Sometimes I cry so hard from pleading
So sick and tired of all the needless beating
This Is Me
Me. Magical. Min. Maniac. Monster. Monetary.
"Never let anything known for anyone to stab you in."
FORGIVE BUT NEVER FORGET!
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Tuesday, May 7, 2013
Who Am I Inside
Am I the kind of person? What about making the right decisions? Why is every decision that I make oppose to the one that I want.
It's like a tornado. My stuffs piling up more and more. Troubles slamming me like tsunami. Drowning the struggling me. I try and grasp some air but I couldn't. The underwater currents rolling in, pulling me down as my limbs start to wave about with no avail. Problems. Solutions. I made my choice. To stick through thick and thin
He was understanding. A man who knows his way to my heart.showed true care and patience as he walks down the path I chose to take. I'm more than thankful.
Sure, a lot of things in life I love. Thankfully. It's time for me to be truthful to myself. Time to avoid my thoughts and loneliness which would only bring about more insecurities and not plan ahead.
Normally, these sounds wrong to not people. The failure to plan. But I'm seeing it as gold. Everything I planned for did not work out. It's time to reflect on actions and re-implement my moves. I must learn that perfection in life is hard to achieve. There's bound to be ups and downs.... I need to learn to let go of all controls I have over and live my life in a whole new way.
Life, is no math. Mathematically inclined me knows that it is the basic of life. Behind the technology, is all mathematics. Every alphabet you see in your computers are mathematics and numbers or number patterns.
Mathematics make up life. But it isn't life. Mathematics are easily explained through fixed formulae. But chemistry, the fundamentals to life - like cells - can be twisted and turned. I failed to predict human's psychology - a subject I only learnt in polytechnic.
I am tearing up and shredding all plans I had.
If 1 + 1 = 2 book can explain all combination and probability of personalities, I can too have a rough guide to what to expect in humans and counteract them efficiently.
Pain is hard to avoid. But at least I'm still human enough to hope and not be disappointed in human kind. However, I need to see the real world. That the world is not going to treat human like a bed of rose. Life is just sucky.
Suck my ass, fuckers. I am stronger now.
But baby, where they knock you down and out
Is where you're oughta stay